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America or Burst

975 Following   406,730 Followers   6,032 Tweets

Join Twitter 3/25/08

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@eliroth HAPPY BIRTHDAY!@edgarwright I am dolphinately jealous right now. (Happy birthday!)I can't find the right hairstyle for me because beauty magazines never list "Marilyn Manson" as a face shape.
4/18
2014
If I was on the Disney Channel, and I had fans, I would want them to call themselves Diablovatics.Question: if a person goes to Ikea alone do they think about breaking up w themselves on the ride home?
Retweeted by Diablo Cody
4/17
2014
There needs to be a term for when your entire sexuality is defined by the video for Fiona Apple's "Criminal."@joshwolfcomedy come on, *I* didn't even use the word "hulled." Also, #420 is on!My child just complained that his strawberries aren't hulled, like I'm IHOP or something.
4/16
2014
I can't accept that Leonardo DiCaprio attended a pool party thrown by McDonald's.
4/14
2014
@JenKirkman I'm going to make a random prediction that "Staircase at the University" will have the most withering lyrics.@JenKirkman It's actually like parody. Can't wait.@MysteryBritExec Thanks, love!
4/11
2014
I loved this song as a kid. :( https://t.co/snMhcfcNTO@quinnemmett LOL, I drunkenly live-snarked most of this movie the other night. Passed out before the best part.
4/10
2014
🇸🇳🇦🇨🇰🇸
Retweeted by Diablo Cody@pattonoswalt Don't assume that the lenses of my sunglasses are fixed in place. #DwayneWayneSplaining@smasher_1970 I'm obsessed with this now, thanks to you: http://t.co/sneIaNqSn1I automatically love any celeb whose year of birth is "disputed" on Wikipedia.
4/8
2014
I just heard myself utter the phrase, "Marcello, never romp naked around a hot pan of shrimp."
4/5
2014
@jakefogelnest Riding horse into rhubarb patch, dismounting, drawing Eye of Sauron in dirt.
4/4
2014
"Mad question-asking" is the cutest Biggie Smalls lyric.Love #DavidLetterman. He put me on his show in 2006 when I was still living in MN. He roots for weirdos. Forever grateful.
4/3
2014
@quinnemmett Marcello stole my "pomodoro" after 2 days and it was never seen again.
4/2
2014
@itsmikerock Thanks, Mike!@AGraynor that's what I tell my kids every day! "YOU'RE NOT MERYL." j/k thank you, girl!@tobyherman27 Thanks, Toby!@KiwiLovesYou @BrianLynch Aww, girl, thanks!@quinnemmett Thank you! I'm coming to your new digs bearing cronuts & assorted cheese as soon as I get my shit together!@LucindaLunacy Thank you!@samantharobot Thank you! P.S. I write in a food court sometimes, too.@BrianLynch Thank you, and likewise always!@ChrisSerico Thanks, Ross!@MysteryExec Can I be in Best Friends Club, though?!@billyeichner 100%! ILY!@johngary Thanks, man.@scottEweinberg You just did, sweetie. <3@BittrScrptReadr Thank you!Seriously, I am really excited to work with Merylegend and Demme-God! cc: @billyeichnerWhat if TriStar & Meryl were just fucking with me for April Fool's? http://t.co/800L2gZcV0
4/1
2014
That was a weird one.@kayhanley The best.
3/28
2014
@susanorlean Same here!LOL, this is a misleading URL: http://t.co/ZEeWYwS2i2Me: "Do you like these new sandals?" Dan: (pause) "Well, not everything has to be sexy."@pattonoswalt It's awesome, and not just because the creator looks like F.F. Woodycooks.I'm such a Shailene, you guys.
3/21
2014
@Tempdiaries @MysteryExec @MysteryHelmer @clups @nikki_griffin YESSSS. I love early, dirty Rod!If Sofia's doing "The Little Mermaid," I call dibs on that VHS rip-off version they always had at the grocery store. http://t.co/qxZtcRZIOeLove this-- it's like the Mensa version of Publisher's Clearinghouse. http://t.co/PI8pYHihG3I wish the "NAILED IT" meme had existed in 1995 when everyone was getting really bad versions of the Rachel haircut.
3/18
2014
Holy shit @sia, what a chorus! https://t.co/LIlxwCTBIK
3/17
2014
Looking at pics of Jemima Kirke's life on @vulture made me feel like a dorky suburban toaster waffle.
3/14
2014
@MysteryCr8tve @MysteryExec @MysteryVP It's a "nicer" Denny's. Afterwards, we saw "Mamma Mia" (also a test).@MysteryVP @MysteryExec I had my first date with my husband there. It is a test.@LouisPeitzman @KenJennings If u can't handle me at my worst, louis, you don't deserve me at my best!!! #marilyn@KenJennings @LouisPeitzman http://t.co/WkLVkjWf09 ;)@LouisPeitzman @KenJennings did you guys see the Jon travlota name generator??? ROFLMAO@KenJennings Too easy, Jennings.
3/13
2014
@BrodyismeFriend Stellar work on Kroll Show!
3/12
2014
@wescraven Good luck and stay off the Internet!
3/10
2014
Treaty of Breast-Litovsk #erotichistory@katherinefugate I'm also on deadline, which means my toes need a polish change immediately.@ChrisSerico Why didn't anyone tell me there's a full vid for "L.A. Deli"?! http://t.co/08wdM35zDO
3/6
2014
@bjcolangelo Good vibes and best of luck to you.
3/4
2014
@molls This happened to me last year, and it was such a nice surprise.
3/3
2014
@lenadunham I would like to thank my unruly pubes for inspiring me each and every day. P.S. ILY@clmazin I care!@flavorwire Agree! <3TRUE STORY: we were at a party recently and someone goes "Benny Medina is here," and my husband says "is that the chick from Frozen?"#SarahJones
Retweeted by Diablo CodyCatherine Martin has my favorite dress, but that's just me and my wack taste.MOVIE STAR@EricIGN I LOVE YOUMany of these women have tufts of bush coming out of the pee-hole in their Spanx.http://t.co/Fn8Pw7BOfo
3/2
2014
Schnappocalypse Now #drunkfilms @midnight
2/26
2014
Alcohol has the same effect on me as it does on Beyoncé, except what she does to Jay-Z, I do to a frozen pizza.
2/24
2014
"An animated feature about the king of the jungle? Get Phil Collins on the phone!"@Tempdiaries <3 Happy Friday!Smart piece by Chelsea Handler on being treated as a "parenthetical" in the LateNightWars coverage: http://t.co/CFWETcxRqx
Retweeted by Diablo Cody
2/21
2014
I don't think "Gimme a Break" was the best possible title for that show. "She's the Chief" would have been better. Or "Nell of the Ball."
2/19
2014
@jennyandteets SID!!! Congrats, Mom! ❤️❤️❤️
2/18
2014
I knew that homophobic birthday invitation thing was fake because no kid in 2014 is named "Tommy."
2/17
2014
@SarahSoWitty @MysteryExec This proves nothing! (But you are astounding, talented and wonderful.) 😘@BigAlPeoplesPal @dmaurio Love you guys too! Have a magical Valentine's Day."One of my goals in life is to have the biggest residential pool on the planet." -why I like Drake.
2/14
2014
@ChrisSerico #LADeli is my favorite song. I need a full version.
2/13
2014
This is the best thing that has ever happened to me. #Sochi http://t.co/gVOsirBXCV
Retweeted by Diablo CodyRihanna wrote "Stay" about Billy Crystal. #musictrivia
2/7
2014
No one has ever sounded higher than Gene Clark singing on "Mr. Tambourine Man."
2/6
2014
"The most she will do is throw shadows at you..." DID BILLY JOEL INVENT THROWING SHADE IN 1977??
2/5
2014
Television has pretty much failed in its 50-year plan to get us to call our sisters "Sis."
Retweeted by Diablo Cody
2/4
2014
@louisvirtel Also, let's not make this about Susan Stafford, OK? You don't see me linking to Barris's book when the subject is Tomarken.@louisvirtel I knew you would answer the summons! I usually defend Miley, but she's no match for America's favorite crocheter. #GODDESSMiley: “I just don’t get what...girls are wearing. Everyone to me seems like Vanna White." UM, I WISH EVERYONE WAS LIKE QUEEN VANNA!
2/3
2014
I'm too sad to say anything useful here. #RIPPSH
2/2
2014
@lizmeriwether My body is ready! #PaisleyParkIsInMyHeart@LaurenSchacher Aww, thank you!.@jasonreitman is a genius and one of our REAL filmmakers. See the lovely #LaborDay and support an artist who gives a shit.If your name is Arthur, you kind of have to have "Arthur's Theme" as your ringtone.
1/31
2014
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