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I'd take Mary Berry in a straight fight http://t.co/7ZECxVXoK2@wearz why on earth is a programme of record, like Newsnight, giving this guy the airtime to justify the unjustifiable?

Craig David Cameron: "BO! CAN I GET A RE-ELECTION?" No. #CelebNameMash http://t.co/H7IakoB4jh (via @JimboLoony)
Retweeted by Rachel FellowsDukan burger http://t.co/rmGVQPa4LY

Is the guy with the glasses a dwarf or just far away? #TheApprenticeNo desire to watch the #woolwich video. All I can think about is that poor guys familyOk ... for the last time ... it's AVOCADO (not aDvocado); it's time IN MEMORIAM (not in memoriaL); and it's ESPRESSO (not eXpresso)

Graph of the day | The Poke: http://t.co/UZK0cf09rl via @thepoke@CalverleyShins Correct!

#daftpunk Marketing masters of our timeProper Bo Yorkshire brass band doing an immense version of Cant Take My Eyes Off You. http://t.co/V8WTUYZD6AMy day to lie in but evil genius Tim's tactics thwart me #baconsmells

@wearz Didnt know they did that. Great campaign tho.@wearz ahhhhhhh. The squirrels are bloody good aren't they?@wearz Wot?

@wearz @cadillacjukebox I can. He's ace@cadillacjukebox oh I know your hatred of the fiction of Mr PeaceThe Damned United is such a great film#facetune. Genius app

The silence of working from home is deafening but, today, its broken by live itunes streaming of #daftpunk album. Marvellous it is too.

"shooooess!" #bgt

Breakfast on the train to London. Always feels like a treat.

David Tennant doing his King Midas of the telly thing again. Cracking end to #thepoliticianshusband@lousul 😊😊😊😊😊@CalverleyShins Ain't gonna happen!@CalverleyShins Hospital visit (long story) that means I don't have to go back. If I could cartwheel you'd see me spinning past your gaff!A really important and happy day. I don't care that its lashing down :-))))))

Kidnap Hero Charles Ramsey Auto-Tuned | The Poke: http://t.co/eUiCcrJtbY via @thepokeI feel like an intellectual colossus #theapprentice

@CalverleyShins You are now my traffic Yoda.Flamingo Land riding the roller coasters. Tim was only in it for the white knuckle ones. http://t.co/6WFtGnKdBKNorthbound #A1 great fencoat. Caravan sheared off its wheels. Belongings all over the road & massive qs. AVOID

Nearly wet myself laughing ....... 21 Family Photos: Then And Yikes http://t.co/OixRI2525Y via @buzzfeed

Wow #BGT@wearz haaaaa!Recycled Xmas trees = Yorkshire reservoir windbreaks http://t.co/Bz5VvIZCfvListening to Leftfield, Leftism. Still sooooo good. #choooon!

Instructions on my eye cream ... genius http://t.co/I88UUh5tJSI've decided that #candycrush is a North Korean mind control plot.Liking my #daftpunk ear worm .....

@hwallop You may use this, to keep track. You are welcome. http://t.co/wB7XfnM99j
Retweeted by Rachel FellowsGeezer bird FTW! #masterchef@cadillacjukebox Of Orange.@cadillacjukebox I heard ... but I haven't missed her I'm afraid@cadillacjukebox that's the televisual equivalent of Stockholm Syndrome.@cadillacjukebox WTF?!?Oooooo. Warm sunshine.

In a Dublin taxi listening to The Corrs #cliche

@wearz but at least dogs and dolphins will now understand how the match went.I'm craving lavender and milk ice cream. Maybe a glass of skimmed with some Yardley in it? #masterchef

Made by my own fair hands and I'm so proud of myself! http://t.co/wv7D3aUsjf

2am .... awake .... #jetlag

Lunchtime, and this trip has taught me that Moutabel knocks Baba Ganoush out of the park #yummyEeeeek! http://t.co/rnrJhcw93v

Think the caption should read 'Jeremy'? #mailfail http://t.co/a9omLyYw2dThe Wedding Singer. Great film, superb soundtrack, even better hairstyles. http://t.co/8j0B6L687P@OfficialBanker Bless you. My friend in Dubai came over all Demarchelier .... not THAT wayThis time tomorrow I will be a world record-breaker!

Greetings from sunny Dubai http://t.co/YmH2WItlhjJust cooler .... http://t.co/vbe0FzdKcp@wearz Spooky if you ask me@wearz Oh aye. I hear they have WiFi so watch out for tweets from 50,000 ft.@wearz Business. Corn Flakes don't cost that much!Breakfasting in the Emirates Lounge before a trip to Dubai. #vealsausagesrock

@OfficialBanker True .. thousands of £££s invested in minor public schools to acquire such prodigious skills is surely money well-spent eh?@OfficialBanker You can keep your A list movie types, meeting Olivia Colman would leave me utterly star struck. LOVE her.@OfficialBanker Unlike his missus .... like a bloody mule eh?A twist would have been cheap. Wonderful stuff #broadchurchThis isn't over ...... #broadchurchStill time for a twist? #BroadchurchI'm calling it ... it was the copper's son #Broadchurch

The FA propose new measures to deal with Suarez. #BTJ http://t.co/GeORcQdbwe
Retweeted by Rachel Fellows@wearz Yeah .... thought so@wearz if you wanna come Mr Shuffles will be throwing down the beats.Birthday party invitations ... sorted. From the photobooth in my pocket. #pocketbooth http://t.co/8RkTIJpOBF#Cycling in parks bylaws ... know how to overturn them? Crazy that my 7 yr old should be verbally attacked every time she tries to exercise.

#DealornoDeal Ouch ....

RT @rolldiggity: Twitter does its best work in the first five minutes after a disaster, and its worst in the twelve hours after that.
Retweeted by Rachel Fellows@wearz I heard she was pregnant and blind .... git

@wearz Again ... Sh*te@wearz Sh*te@wearz on now?Separated at birth ... Lady Gaga, Alejandro ... Ace of Bass, All That She WantsWarmest day of the year and I'm in a car on a 6hr trip to Somerset #boooooo@wearz haaaa! That needs some System of a Down over it!

Diddy and Pharrell hilarious in #gethimtothegreek@OfficialBanker your problem is you don't think creatively http://t.co/TnxqtF6VjmThis is ace .... Same Old Scene (Glimmers Remix) by BryanFerry via #soundcloud http://t.co/MN7csuEX1q#Gap sale. Flouro pink skinny jeans ... bought. Perhaps in error.Mmmmmmmmmm #sun

Lunch at The Wolseley http://t.co/cCLqvM4VkF

Heading to that there London http://t.co/RTLqKhUDfd

@wearz righto. We'll have a think and text u during the day?@wearz great. When do you get finished and do you want to stay near Ealing or go city centre?Those were the days .... in labour for 10 mins, max. #thevillageYou can keep 'Downton'. #thevillageIt's a bit screwed up when 11 degrees feels like summertime.

Stomach cancer patient on #bbcbreakfast .... what a lovely, sweet and inspiring guy.

#broadchurch is crackingThe man skirt shows that mumsy old Boden really does have an evil sense of humour. http://t.co/K61NgtOtds